[GUH JIT MAL BY g.o.d]

can't memorize the song hehehe....

special thanks to clair from a korean forum who translated the song.... =D

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[GUH JIT MAL BY g.o.d]

I'm sorry.

I don't like you anymore.
Let's break up now.
I found someone else,
Someone much better than you.
Don't be disappointed.
I've always been like this.
Please don't bother me anymore.

Yes, I had to do this.
This was the only way.
I lied.
I...
I made you cry eventually.
But this was the only way
For you to give up your heart towards me,
I couldn't help this decision.
Because I knew that if I weren't this way,
You would never leave me,
I knew too well,
So I can't help it
I'd have to lie to you.
I'm sorry,
I'll make you cry.

Good-bye (don't go)
Be happy (don't leave)
Forget me,
Forget me and live on (don't forget me)
I (Yes, I)
am okay (am hurting)
Don't worry about me and go away (please don't go)

Why are you following me?
I said no.
I told you many times,
That I have someone else.
If you keep on doing this,
I'm really gonna get mad.
Please find someone else now.

Why do you do this?
Why do you make it so hard for me?
If you keep on being like this,
It's hard for me to let you go.
What is there to like about me?
I only make you suffer everyday.
And with your merits,
you can always date someone better
(no no)
Get a grip fool,
please get a grip.
I'm telling you again,
I really don't like you anymore.
Please go back, please go away
I don't like you,
I really don't like you.

Good-bye (don't go)
Be happy (don't leave)
Forget me, Forget me and live on (don't forget me)
I (Yes, I)
am okay (am hurting)
Don't worry about me and go away (please don't go)

Don't go (be happy)
Don't leave (forget me, forget me and live on)
Don't forget me (I)
Yes, I (am okay)
Am hurting (don't worry about me and go away)

Please please don't go (be happy, forget me, forget me and live on)
You must not forget me (I)
Yes, I (am okay)
Am hurting.
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why is that so?

i dont know why.

at first i though it was a good year. well at least a good start of the year.

but now im starting to think it over again. everything started to change this week. tsk tsk tsk

yesterday means depression.

today means embarassment.

how unlucky of me.

at my graduated school... still jobless??? im slightly embarassed. slight means minor or small but the point there........ still there is!!!

at home... one of my most embarassing moments (head down) . 100% sure that it is sooooooooo embarassing. minsan may mga bagay na bigla na lamang nangyayari sa di mo inaasahang pagkakataon (sabihin na nating sa di tamang panahon at lugar). all you have to do is face it but of course when it's embarassing...... face them, answer their questions and leave or hhmmm...... you might as well change the topic. it helps. even for me. ^_^

i still believe everything happens for a reason..... even these embarassing moments. ^_^

when excitement becomes depression

depression was one of the topics that my friend, Phijay, was discussing on the phone. i hate that word since that was my feeling the day after. i was so excited about my interview with this one company in ortigas. i woke up late but fortunately i was there at exact 10am.

so i had this interview. at first i felt that it was not the usual interview since she spoke to me in Filipino and what she's doing was just a usual conversation coz she's like treating me as one of her new found friends, no formality! =) but what i did was just to stay on my near-to-formal attitude. then it was finished. she told me she's going to call me for updates. i semi-hate that expression since that's the unconscious way of saying "okay, you didn't pass!". i hope im not concluding too fast.

what makes me depressed is that some were asked to come back after lunch for the exam. that was the start of my depressing moments....... of course its too early too tell but i'm not expecting that much anymore. anyway, of course when ur depressed and if u dnt have ur friends or family with u, where is the best way to go. me? i went at the chapel in galleria telling HIM to pls. help me remove the feeling of it. "i really hate this feeling!!" i said. i did the depression removal way just like what others are doing like shopping and the like. what i realized is that this way of depression removal is just merely diverting but not forgetting. soothing and managing yourself and not thinking of it too much is the best integrated way to manage depression. yourself will always be the sure way to go out of it. if this is not really for me, maybe God has any other plans. i just learn from it. now i'm telling myself..... aja!!! ;)

my shopping experience and the 'dugtungan' game

this day marks the beginning of my shopping adventure. jan. 8, 2005 was my first day of shopping this year. if i can recall, the last time i did the shopping for myself was like 2-4 months ago. see!!! anyway, i was soooooo happy sa mga nabili ko though i wasnt able to buy a pair of thongs. thongs is the top priority in my list un nga lang wala akong nagustuhan sa nakita ko na same or much better than dun sa people are people. i kinda like ung sa traffic but 'kinda' is the operative word ;-) beside the point that it cost 3thou++ . hello?? not worth it i guess. by the way i was with my friend Jayson also known as ason hihi. ang ending? i was able to buy dsl jacket and one pair of nike slippers. i really really like the slippers kaya nga binalikan ko para bilhin. i love it *mwah* and i even got a much more happy feeling when i knew that sobrang new arrival lang un. as in on that day lang dineliver. wala pa sa ibang stores. the price is worth it and much much cheaper than the traffic sandals. i also saw one mig bondoc and sheree. my personal opinion was that they were not like dating or watsoever but if they were, hindi mukha hehe. sheree ikaw ba ang humahabol kay one mig? enough... :)

next stop: mega but since no available chairs on starbucks, we went to podium together with harry. good for us since may nag iisang bakanteng lugar sa starbucks podium. i really had fun especially when i introduced to them the play dugtugan in order to kill time. first topic was country. jayson: "Alaska" then harry: "Alabama" then me: "Antipolo" then jayson again "Oregon" and so on.... the consequence: piso sa bawat hindi makakasagot within the time limit (10 secs). then i changed the topic. the new topic was the "happy" terminologies. dito na nagsimula ang lahat. umabot na ng 10php ako... grrrr paano ba naman kasi puro z lagi ang binibigay sa aking letter kaya nahihirapan ako. napunta lahat ng money kay jayson since he was the one with the least mistakes. i admit pinagpawisan ako at nahirapan ako sa "happy" terminologies na topic na yan ah. eventhough ganun, at the end of the day i was fulfilled coz i had fun spending time with them. im just enjoying our time. enjoying the exact moment and making the most out of it would mean fullfillment.

now i'm home and thinking if i needed a new haircut. i still need to redesign my blog haayyy.

Year 2005 predictions for leo...

Leo in 2005 - Abundance

- Pursuing a successful career, along with the usual social and financial advantages, will be easier this year than it has in a long time for you, Leo! The most difficult thing might be deciding which path means the most to you, and where to put your focus. You'll be able to create opportunities for advancement almost out of thin air.
- Romance in 2005 will make it a year to remember - and you'll be the envy of all your friends. Love comes willingly and easily.
- Money may suddenly become tight at a very inconvenient time. Yet, this is no comparis onto the advancements you'll make overall, and by the end of 2005, you'll look back in sheer wonder and happiness.

i promise to look back again to these predictions. i wanna see if all of these will become true. i promise myself to keep my blog for the year 2005...

leo in abundance??? let's see... haha

anyway it all depends on me.... Ü

ang mga ilang sandali bago sumapit at ng sumapit na ang bagong taon

"Your purpose is to glorify God and of service to your fellow men."

nakakatuwang isipin na minsan talaga ay akmang akma ung kasabihan na aking binabasa araw-araw sa aking naiisip. gumising ako ng di maganda ang pakiramdam. di dahil sa may lagnat pa ako kungdi dahil sa aking sikmura. patuloy kong nilalaban ang sakit. hindi ako makakain ng maayos. sobrang kakarampot biruin mo. ilang sandali pa pagkatapos makapanghalian, pumunta ako sa kwarto ko at binasa ko ang mga kasabihang aking binabasa araw-araw para makita kung ano ang nasasaad para sa dec. 31. un nga (ung asa itaas). tapos naalala ko ung isa sa mga dinasal ko nung gabing iyon. ang sabi ko "sana maging maayos na po ang pakiramdam ko dahil may mga taong umaasa sa akin". pero bakit ng pagkagising ko eh di maganda pakiramdam ko??? bigla ko na lang naisip na cguro kahit na ganun ang nararamdaman ko may mga magagawa pa rin ako para makatulong. naisip ko na tama nga cguro ako sa sinabi ko sa aking dasal, may mga taong umaasa sa tulong ko.... karamihan naman dito ay ang mga bagay pagdating sa bahay gaya ng pagaayos, pagaasikaso ng mga pagkain at kung ano ano pa... pinilit ko na maging maayos ang aking sarili. sabi ko sa sarili ko "gagaling ako at magiging ok ako". buti na lang at habang nagiihaw, nagaayos ng bahay at naghahanda ay unti unti na akong gumagaling.

di naglaon at sumapit na ang bagong taon. yaon at maayos na ang bahay, hapagkainan at ang aking sarili. habang nakasuot ng pula ay tinawag ko na ang aming mga kasama sa bahay at kami ay lumabas upang pagmasdan ang mga paputok na animo'y mga palamuti sa napakalawak na kalangitan. nagkuhanan din kami ng mga litrato. pagkatapos pagmasdan at manuod sa telebisyon ng mga iba't ibang mga pangyayari, isa lamang ang aking nabatid. may mga pangyayaring di tayo inaasahan na sadyang nagaganap na lamang pero nasa atin ito kung paano natin titignan ang mga bagay-bagay. para sa akin, nabatid ko na ang pagkakawala ko ng sakit bago mag bagong taon ay senyales sa akin na isa itong napakagandang simula ng taon para sa akin. itong bagay na ito ay sadyang pinagpapasalamat ko. kahit maliit na bagay pero para sa akin malaki na ito pagkat magiging ayos ako sa araw ng Jan. 1 kasama ng aking pamilya.

kaya bago ako natulog, lubos kong pinasalamatan SIYA sa isang napakagandang araw sa mga sandali bago sumapit at ng sumapit na ang bagong taon.